Updated: Jan 2, 2021
At the end of the year, I like to take some time to reflect. This year I tried a breathwork session. I'd heard great things about it, but I really didn't know what to expect, so I was nervous going into it. But the facilitator was GREAT and by the end, I felt light, spacious, and amazing.
After a warm-up and activation, the facilitator brought us on a journey back through 2020. To acknowledge and let go of anything that needed releasing to free up blockages and space to move forward into the new year.
As I reflected on the first quarter (Jan-Mar), I felt the excitement and ambition. I had a plan to grow the studio, to bring new programming that aligned better with my vision and values. We started the year by restructuring classes to bring in Skills & Drills, Spin pole, and Tricks & Transitions for the membership program and a 6-week beginner program to provide structure and accountability to help novices get a strong start. We had an AMAZING showcase planned for May 2020 and I was super excited for a competition training program.
Of course, not everything went according to plan. As the facilitator brought us into Quarter 2 (Apr-Jun), I felt panic! Fear. I was shaking and crying and felt an intense tightness in my chest and gut. At that time, I was doing my best to hang on. To hold it together. It was exhausting. It was awful!
As the facilitator brought us into Quarter 3 (Jul-Sep), I felt a huge relief as I let go of my grip and let the things not meant for me fall away. Along with the relief, I felt intense disappointment. I have to admit, I was really hoping that the studio was meant for me. Two years ago when I opened the studio, I had felt so strongly that it was exactly my purpose. Now, I felt like I had failed as a leader. That I had let my instructors, my members, everyone down. Looking back on it now, I realized something: leading the studio did not mean carrying everyone's burden for them (which I had done until now). Being a leader meant adapting and helping navigate the new situation.
Moving into Quarter 4 (Oct-Dec), I didn't feel much. I was pretty numb, pretty exhausted. So much happened in such a short period of time. I was still feeling defeated and didn't really want to do anything. I had an idea for a program, but I really didn't know how it would work online. But, I took the leap and went for it. And I am so glad that I did! Running this online program brought me so much joy! I LOVED the challenge of guiding 4 women to the end goal of a showcase performance. I loved carefully curating content to support each woman to perform and showcase their unique strengths and talents. To shine their own special light and to be celebrated for their amazingness! By the end of the year, I really learned the importance of celebrating! The big, the small, the seemingly insignificant - it all deserves a celebration.
To finish up the breathwork session, we breathed, released, and made space. It felt good to release it all. The good, the bad, it is all in the past. None of it will be with me in 2021, so there is no reason to hold on. I felt light and airy like I'd made space. Space for Volair to expand or pivot or do whatever it needs to do as the new year brings new situations. Space for relationships with friends, family, colleagues, etc to grow, to morph, to do whatever they need to do for they need to do for the greater good as the new year brings new experiences. Space for me to become.
The final exercise was to breathe into a word or phrase or intention for 2021.
What came to me, was WHOLENESS.
And so that is my intention for 2021. I trust that I have made the space, built the wisdom, had the experiences I need to live my life WHOLLY. To stop living a fragmented life. And to start celebrating the complex uniqueness that is ME!
I invite you to take some time to reflect on your year. Acknowledge every piece of it. Absorb the lessons, celebrate the achievements, and let it all go. Make space and prepare for whatever 2021 may bring.
For guidance on chosing an intention to shine your unique light, get the replay of our Shine your Light free dance, reflection and intention setting.
Wishing you a happy, healthy, abundant 2021.